After the Pats loss yesterday I woke up this morning with an empty feeling inside. I feel like I should do something with my life, but that would actually take some sort of effort. Instead I compiled a list of 5 things that maybe I should look into with all this extra time on my hands.
1) Start a World of Warcraft Account
Me, my computer, and thousands of new lonely friends. Playing World of Warcraft for ten hours a day will give me an excuse why I look so hideous and detest sunlight.
2) Get Really Into the Winter Olympics
Is Apolo Ohno in these Olympics? I would have to think so with all those Subway commercials that he’s in. Maybe watching curling or some other sport that we forget for four years will distract my thoughts from Demaryius Thomas owning our Secondary.
3) Go Vegan
Maybe the large buffalo chicken calzone and loaded nachos that I consumed by myself was a bad omen for the Patriots. Maybe if I start taking shots of Wheat Grass this will somehow realign the universe in the Pats favor.
4) Start a Fantasy D-League Basketball League
The NBA is awful, but what’s even more depressing is the D-League. The amount of time it will take to research D-League players’ potential will probably put me somewhere in August right before the second preseason game. I just put in an order for my Springfield Armor personalized Guar jersey.
5) Eat My Feelings
Pile it on. We have to wait until the draft for any new updates to the Pats’ roster. Wilfork has a long comeback and who knows what Gronk’s status will be for next year. I know I shouldn’t complain and that the team made it to the AFC Championship, but every time I see a Papa John’s commercial with Peyton, I can’t help but pick up the phone and order a horrible pizza with extra garlic butter. F*ckin Wes Welker…..