5. Peyton Manning
We kick off this week’s countdown of biggest media whores in the NFL with quite possibly the biggest forehead known to mankind, Peyton Manning. Whether its Gatorade commercials, pitching sports equipment, or making a fool of himself with his brother during the ESPN promo spots in between sportscenter, Manning never fails at attempting to convince the U.S. population that a man who moves/act/looks like Frankenstein can still be somewhat presentable on T.V. And have you noticed how the only news out of Indi this free agency period has been about Peyton Manning’s neck problems? Call me nuts, but if I were a fan of this team, and my most valuable player is having problems with a body part that has to support that giant head, I would be nervous.
4. Chris Cooley
Let’s start this segment about Cooley off with the fact that his nickname among teammates is “Captain Chaos.” Really? Your nickname is Captain Chaos. You play for the worst team in the league, and the highlight of your career is that you got your wife fired as a cheerleader from the Redskins for marrying your ass. Chris is one of those guys that basks in the attention for being notarized in social media. He has his own website, appears on podcasts, and even does commercials to try to increase is own public reputation. Come to think of it, I hate this guy, not only because he grabs his ankles when it comes to trading in self respect for mainstream attention, but also because he “accidentally” went viral with a picture of his wenis a few years back. Save it Chris, we all know that you did it on purpose, and as soon as people starting sizing you up, you tucked your tails in between your legs and tried to chalk it up as a mistake.
3. Terrell Owens
A man at the end of his NFL career, but with multiple shows on VH1 under his belt, its safe to say the T.O. will forever be stained within social media for years to come. From reality shows about his personal assistants that honestly get paid to look not attractive, to dating shows that prove to be lullaby music for those with dementia, it’s pretty cut and clear Owens would probably sell his first born to be forever immortalized on T.V. On the plus side, we all know damn well that when T.O. retires and publishes a tell all e-book about each quarterback he’s played along side with that it is going to be pure gold. Behind the scenes looks at Tony Romo and Donovan McNabb? Suck it TMZ.
2. Brett Favre
Yea hes “retired” but when you’re tossing around the term whore and media, and add in the fact that even the shear whisper that Brett could return, pitches a tent in every media reporter’s pants, you have to add this man to the list. Honestly though, can you name me any other athlete that has dominated the headlines as much as Favre at the end of his tenure? Jordan maybe, but that’s because he was the G.O.A.T. of his sport and had a gambling problem so severe it would even make John Daly blush.
1. Chad Ochocinco
The most media hungry NFL human on the planet, and also sporting the most active twitter account known under the sun. Chad Ochocino can rest his head at night knowing he’s the most interesting player in the NFL on social media, and he has the resume to prove so. From making the HBO series “Hard Knocks” a main staple to salvaging Terrell Owen’s career with the T.Ocho show, Chad knows what he’s doing and he does it well. Sadly for me, he is now a Patriot, which means that I have to hate him as if he were the bubonic plague. In other news, it will be interesting to see if Ochocinco will either put an end to his antics under the New England helm with social media, or if he will convince Belichick to create a twitter account under the surname “BillsBananaHammock”.